Saturday, August 05, 2006

Boredom

Loneliness. I wake up to a silent day. Coffee and the newspaper. Somebody dead, a thousand dead, somebody won and somebody murdered. Not a flicker on my face. I fold the paper and down my coffee.

Breakfast time. TV. Silicone, murders and pop. I am so bored. I look at my watch and it tells me that there are another twelve hours to kill. I pick a book flip a page, and toss it away.

Should I kill myself ? Maybe death holds some meaning. Maybe I'd feel something then.

Lunch - Chicken. I used to enjoy eating. Now its a task. Death, pain I think again. Maybe.

Night. Dinner is on the table, but I am not interested. I sit at the table and watch my blood pool on the floor below. Interesting color. The sharp ache on my wrist has dulled to a throbbing. I am so bored. Its getting dark. Did I not turn the lights on earlier ?

Oh.

So this is it. But I feel nothing. I was supposed to feel something. Damn.

5 comments:

zimblymallu said...

hell is sensory deprivation and loneliness.

Anonymous said...

I hear you brother.

It's actually worse in my case. Thanks to the dreary nature of my work I generally don't make it to the dinner part of it.

-The 'jack-off all' guy ;-)

Jake said...

this is fiction people. just fiction.

Anonymous said...

oh its fiction. just fiction. damn.

Ani

Jake said...

lol. and she shows up here.